Here It Comes Now

Stolen from the Interwebs

Although The Strokes' fifth album The Comedown Machine isn't officially released in its entirety until March 26th of this year, they have released two songs off of the album that I would love to share with you all.  On a completely unrelated side note, I started thinking of what a fifth album would be called in terms of class year.... you know: first album, sophomore album, junior album, senior album.... then what?  I think it should be called a "PG album" (i.e. post graduate album).  Do you think that will fly?  Cause when I Googled "PG album," the first searches I got were for Peter Gabriel albums.  Maybe a fifth album release should just be called "Peter Gabriel albums" because he's pretty terrific.

Back to The Strokes.  They are my favorite band.  Not because I love every single one of their songs (believe me, there a couple dogs in there... cough Fear of Sleep...cough. Seriously, it sounds like Casablancas is piss drunk and couldn't come up with more lyrics than "fear of sleep" after a certain point), but I love the drunkenness-falsetto-rock-man-thing.  Julian Casablancas wears it well under his big ole sunglasses.  Secretly he works at Sunglasses Hut and gets drunk and sings with his friends... or at least that's what I dream he does.  WOW. OKAY.

Also from the internet.  I only wish I was this close to them.

So the two songs that have been released off of their new album The Comedown Machine are "All The Time" and "One Way Trigger".  "All The Time" sounds like an outtake from their sophomore album Room on Fire since it has an uptempo "driving in a tour bus" vibe going on.  What I've noticed about The Strokes as their sound matures is that their uptempo beats have aged as well.  Even when one of their songs is fast paced, it seems that they are still going in slightly slower motion than some of the younger albums' songs.  It's like listening to a radio version of a song and then listening to the original, only to realize it's supposed to be played slower.  You just got so used to the version you initially heard that the slower "regular" version just sounds weird to you now.  It's not a bad thing or a good thing, it's just a noticeable difference.  

With both songs you hear the lads dealing with more mature issues.  In "All The Time" Julian questions the stability of a relationship by singing, "Do you want what I want too?  All the time in the world is all that's necessary."  It's not mere coincidence that in both released songs, he battles long-term relationship woes.  In "One Way Trigger" Casablancas croons in his falsetto, "Find a job, find a friend, find a home, find a dog, settle down, out of town, find a dream, shut it down" and  I can't help but wonder whether he and his bandmates are getting pressured by their significant others to "shut it down."  They are rock n' rollers and will do no such thing.  The fact that this approach to their writing is so different from the penetration-romance genre that I initially fell in love with makes me nostalgic for the good old days.  They're all older, in relationships, and contemplating their 30's.  It only seems reasonable that their music should echo this.  I guess this just depresses me because like romances, their albums were so exciting and unpredictable in the beginning.  I only hope that the boys stick in one or two songs about going to the bathroom to poon a lady.  That being said, I wait with baited breath for the rest of the album.  Also, I will forever love The Strokes.  The end.

Good Morning, Good Morning

Ahhhhh breakfast.  The best meal of the day.  Turns out it's not the most important meal of the day (it's supposedly lunch), but I still love making breakfast the most.  I'm just really into cooking eggs.  I'm a perfectionist when it comes to frying and poaching them.  One of these days I'll do a post all about poaching eggs (I can feel your excitement from here).  But in the meantime, I'm just gonna share a recipe that's uber easy, delicious, and healthy.  

Strawberry & Banana Muffins

yields 6 muffins or 12 mini-muffins

1 banana

2 eggs

1 handful of strawberries (you can also trade out strawberries for blueberries, blackberries, snozzberries, Berry Berry Kix, etc.)

1.  Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

2.  Blend banana and eggs together. 

3.  Put cupcake liners in tins, and fill cups up about three quarters of the way up.

4.  Chop strawberries into very small pieces and distribute the berries evenly amongst the cupcake tins.

5.  Bake muffins for 10-12 minutes or until the tops are just starting to turn golden brown.

Simple. Healthy. Delicious.  I feel like Gordon Ramsay saying that. Good times.  

Diabetes

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!  Calm down.  Today we will be baking! Yay V-day!  If your boyfriend is allergic to dairy like mine is, then you sit in bed next to him eating a giant block of cheese while watching Chopped.  Also, you tend to bake more dairy-free things so that you're not eating all the cookies alone. In a corner. Because you're an asshole.  SO.  My favorite thing to make my lover is snicker doodles.  They're his favorite type of cookie, and I've perfected this recipe.  And it makes me happy that I know at least one recipe by heart (besides my chili).  I did something slightly different by cooking them in a heart-shaped cupcake tray that I got at CVS.  If you have a heart-shaped cookie cutter, then that works too.

Snicker doodles
Bitch, I did this myself. (Yields 40 cookies.  I know, right?)

1 cup butter
1 1/2 cups sugar
2 eggs
2 3/4 cups flour
1 pinch baking soda
1 pinch salt
2 tablespoons cinnamon
sugar and cinnamon to roll the dough balls in before baking

1.  Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

2. Mix butter, sugar, and eggs together in a mixer on low speed.

3.  Mix in baking soda, salt, and cinnamon.

4.  Add the flour (in small batches) to the mixing bowl.  Mix all ingredients on low speed until combined.

5.  Mix equal parts sugar and cinnamon in a separate bowl.

6.  Shape the dough into 1-inch balls and roll them in the cinnamon-sugar mixture.  Using your hands, mush the dough into the cupcake tray hearts (or just place the dough balls on a baking sheet if you're not feeling the hearts).

7.  Bake for 12-15 minutes or until edges just start to turn golden brown.

You can never go wrong with butter and sugar... and cinnamon.  Cinnamon is up there.  Happy Valentimes!

Let's Pretend We're Healthy

Hello everyone.  So I've been experimenting with kale lately... you know, making salads, stir-fries, smoothies, and chips.  I'm a lot late on the whole "kale is cool" boat, but whatever.  Who cares?  Anyway, today I am sharing a recipe that I found while surfing the internet for a savory way to cook kale.  I kind of want to try salt and vinegar kale, but that might be disgusting. Or genius. But this recipe is pretty good.  You might have to season the bejesus out of the kale in order to achieve the taste you want, but here you go.

Barbecue Kale Chips
adapted from The Food Network

1 bunch kale (washed and dried thoroughly)
olive oil
1/4 cup paprika
2 tablespoons chile powder
1 tablespoon garlic powder
1 tablespoon salt
1 teaspoon pepper
1/2 teaspoon dry mustard

1. Preheat the oven to 275 degrees.

2. Remove kale leaves from stem and tear the leaves into big bite-size pieces (the kale will shrink a little as it cooks in the oven).

3. Toss kale in a bowl with olive oil so each piece gets an even coat.

4.  Lie the kale out on a baking sheet and bake for 20-25 minutes, tossing the kale halfway through.  Kale is done when it is crispy and browned on the edges.

5.  Mix the paprika, chile powder, garlic powder, salt, pepper, and dry mustard together in a bowl to create BBQ seasoning.

6.  Sprinkle (or in my case pour on) the barbecue seasoning, and toss kale in a bowl.

Now curl up on your couch with those kale chips and read that book that you haven't read, but your mom gave it to you.